my first gracie heartbreak

One of Gracie's favorite books is about a little bunny who is playing hide and seek with his mommy but has trouble finding an appropriate hiding place. It's kind of a stupid book because the bunny never really finds a hiding place, but his mommy says at the end, "Little bunny, aren't you smart? Finding you is my favorite part!" Anyway. I always interject the phrase, "But thank you anyway" when bunny tells one of his friends why he is unable to hide with them. I do this because I really want Grace to learn to be polite and have manners. It's something that is so easy to forget as we rush through the daily craziness of life. I never really gave much thought, however, to the fact that other people may not always show her politeness in kind.

The other day at the library there was a cute little girl, around 2 or 3 years old, playing quietly with a stuffed frog. Gracie eyed up that frog and made her approach. But as she crawled closer and closer to the frog, the little girl pulled the frog further and further away from Grace. I think Grace thought it was a game. She'd sit for a moment just looking at the girl, a little confused, and then make her move again, only to have the frog pulled away. I sat watching from the other side of the colorful rug. And my heart broke. I don't think Grace knew that the girl didn't want her anywhere near her frog, but I knew. And seeing that Grace didn't get mad, that she persisted and, maybe, wondered why she couldn't get that frog made me want to yell across the rug at the little girl's mommy, "Hey! Make youre kid share, would you!?"

Ultimately, Grace ended up with the frog, but that really isn't the point of my story. Nor is my point to say the little girl was naughty. She wasn't. She was just being 2 or 3 years old, probably accustomed to having to fight for her stuff since she had a big brother only slightly older than herself. My point is that I never realized how much it would hurt to see my baby having to fend for herself in a world that is not always kind. I've written in this blog several times about how my greatest wishes for Gracie are that she treats people with kindness, that she's thoughtful and caring when it comes to the feelings and needs of others. But what about how she deals with the cruelty that will inevitably befall her in life?

I realize cruelty is a strong word when talking about kids not sharing their toys, but isn't this how it all starts? The gateway drug into bullyiing and gossip--true evils that any school aged kid will be subject to at one time or another. It's funny. I would never wish to go back to the times in my life when I felt victimized by a bully, mean words, kids unwilling to share--and God knows there were many. But I'd live those moments over every day if it meant that Gracie would never have to.